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Sometimes your partner isn’t in the mood when you are. While that can be a little frustrating, knowing how to initiate sex the right way will help.
Let’s be real, if you’ve been with the same partner for a while, sex can get a little boring. You may even realize that after the initial honeymoon phase is over, your once always-horny significant other just doesn’t seem to want it. And that means you need to learn how to initiate sex to get them in the mood.
You can’t just go up to your partner and say, “let’s have sex.” It just doesn’t work. Maybe it will occasionally, but it won’t be very exciting and the sex will be underwhelming.
Spicing up your sex life can save your relationship
I know a relationship is more than just sex, but getting frisky with each other plays a huge role. Intimacy is important. You bond and build a stronger connection when you get vulnerable and have sex.
Many couples have the most issues when their sex life is lacking. Their communication gets thrown off and they end up feeling distant from one another. So even though your partner may not be in the mood, get them in the mood. Learn how to initiate sex in an alluring and new way. [Read: 16 mind-blowing ways to spice up your relationship]
How to initiate sex and turn on your lover
There’s definitely a right and wrong way to initiate sex. If you do it in the wrong way, you won’t get anywhere. Knowing how to initiate sex with your partner in a way that makes them eager to hop in bed with you is the secret to a healthy sex life.
You both want to have sex. Sometimes, it’s just a matter of who is willing to put in the work to turn the other on. If that’s you, then you’re in the right place. Find out how to initiate sex in new, enticing ways.
#1 Get an early start. If you want to have sex with your significant other that night, you should start initiating it early in the day. The best way to do this is by sending little texts or even naughty pictures while they’re at work.
Don’t just make it silly. Take it seriously and send them things you know would get them excited. Something as simple as, “I can’t stop thinking about the last thing we did in bed,” is enough to make them picture it. Build the anticipation and they’ll be ready when they come home.
#2 Pamper them. A great way to start initiating sex is to just pamper your partner. Draw them a bath, give them a nice back rub, and make them feel great. You can even give them a little foot massage and work your hands up their body.
When your partner is relaxed and they feel pampered, they’ll be more open to your advances. This makes it much easier to just start kissing them and get the ball rolling.
#3 Do it sneakily. Knowing how to initiate sex with your significant other can sometimes mean getting a little sneaky. Oftentimes, this type of initiation comes after they basically said no to your previous advances.
Pretend that you’ve given up and then be sneaky about it. Give them a little massage and slowly work your hands down while kissing their neck. The trick here is to just be very slow and subtle about it. Turn them on without being obvious about the fact that you want sex.
#4 Put on something sexy. We all know just how much visual stimulation can get someone worked up. So go out and get something you know your significant other will love.
It doesn’t have to be anything crazy. Something simple that you know they’ll appreciate can be enough to initiate sex without you even saying a word.